You regularly get a call around dinner time on Friday or Saturday night, to just hang out. Then after she’s wrung you out, she bolts. She says she’s going to meet her girlfriends, but you might just be the warm up for the main event. A little something to settle the nerves before her big date. There’s really no defense against this one, unless you want to go into full-on stalker mode. But why would you? You’ve stumbled upon a rare and beautiful thing: friends with benefits. Just make sure she brings the beer.
I Have To Tell You About My Period Guy
Some girls are obsessed with talking. Some girls are obsessed with their period. Then there are the girls obsessed with talking about their period. And as long as you have insider information about that area, you are obligated to listen.
If you let this go on, you will be sucked into the abyss. We suggest the next time she starts talking about how she stopped spotting since she went organic, you need to start channel surfing for Cheers reruns. If she’s still around in the morning then maybe we were wrong.
Funny Guy
You are a laugh a minute. The life of the party. It’s no secret that funny equals sexy for a lot of girls. It’s like your own love potion number nine and you can make it up in your head. Just don’t decide that you’d like to have a serious side to the relationship. When you run out of material, you’ve run out of time, and the jokes on you.
The Fridge Guy
Maybe you’re a great cook, or maybe you work at a restaurant. For whatever reason, you have awesome leftovers in your fridge. They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach but it’s no less true that the way into a woman’s pants is through her, um, chocolate box. There are actually tons of aphrodisiac foods, so if you’re making a shopping list, keep plenty of bananas, watermelon and salmon steaks on hand. A bottle of red wine wouldn’t hurt either. She probably would have dumped you after the first date but your chocolate volcano cake is just so damn good.
The ‘I Gotta Go’ Guy
They say parting is such sweet sorrow. If your girl is always catching an early flight, it could be she’s just a sucker for teary goodbyes. Face facts though, there’s a chance you’re just an overnight connection, a whistle stop to stoke her firebox, a port for the storm. Or she might just need a ride to the airport.
Credit: Young So
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